Blogs for Mirth Obligatory Post #2...Michael Moore--how do I love thee...

Ode to Michael Moore, Part II
(with apologies to Elizabeth Barrett Browning)

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My arms can reach, around thy waist which is not slight...
For the ends of Dingleberries and ideal Grace.
For that unshaven beard that adorns thy face...
Most quiet need, by Domino's and Maid Rite,
I love thee freely, though thou blockest my light;
I love thee purely, as thou turnest thy gaze.
Toward the Taco Bell with thy eyes aglazed..
In thy olden briefs, with thy racing stripes.
I love thee even though thou smellest ripe..
With thy putrid teeth, --- and with thy foul breath...
Smiles, tears from the stench! --- and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death!

Obligatory Blogs for Mirth Post #1

Ode to Michael Moore (to the tune of "Close to you" by The Carpenters)

Why do flies, suddenly appear...
Every time you are near?
Can't you see, it's perfectly plain to see you have B.O.

Why do birds fall out of the sky...
Every time, you walk by?

Can't you see, it's perfectly plain to see you have, B.O...

On the day when you were born the angels got together
And decided to create a gag come true..
So they sprinkled cow dung in your hair
And sprayed some skunk juice in your armpits tooooooo (pee-yew)

That's why all the skunks in town...
Follow you, all around...
Can't you see, it's perfectly plain to see you have... B.O.
Can't you see, it's perfectly plain to see you have...B.O...

Why, Oh Why..do you have B.O. (I really wanna know, I really wanna know)
Why, Oh Why..do you have B.O. (I really wanna know I really wanna know)
Why, Oh Why..do you have B.O. (and I don't mean Barack Obamaaaaaaa)