Friday, July 29, 2005

A whole lotta meme going on....

It would appear that the MOBosphere is popping up with song parodies, like here and here and here. Well, I'd like to add to that body of flippancy by contributing the following. True, it's not classic rock, but it is a classic, and I wrote it around 21 years ago, as an ode to a co-worker that kept on stealing my ideas as a radio copywriter/producer:

Big Jule (to the tune of Big John by Jimmy Dean)

It all started one day on the fifth of June,
The night that there was a big blue moon..

From that day on twasn't a donut that was safe,
From the mouth of a great big oversized waif named Jule

Big Juule.. big Jule, Big Juuuule--BIG BAD JULE!

Well the donut shop was a big hangout,
But she ate all the donuts and she let out a shout--
She cried "Where's more donuts?!?" and a blow of her hand
Sent another poor baker to the promised land, Big Jule.

Well all the donuts were gone, she grazed out of her range
So she went to McDonald's to watch the numbers change.
After three million burgers, she let out a sigh,
"With a meal like that I can go for some pie!" Big Jule. (Refrain)

Well all the food was gone-there wasn't a lead,
Everything was gone from fruit to seed--
So the townspeople said, "Everyone take heed!
Let's blow this town 'cause there's nothing left to feed Jule!"

'Twas a voracious appetite that led Jule on,
To eatin' everything from buildings to lawn,
And she ate and she ate til there wasn't nothin' left
But that nine-story building at 5th & Calumet-Big Jule.

Well she started on the cornerstone and ate her way indoors
She gobbled everything from the sinks to the floors...
But when she got to the trusses, the building collapsed..
and everybody knew they finally seen the last-of Big Jule. (Refrain)

Well there's not much left of that town today,
All the townspeople just moved away..
Not much of that building, 'cept a sign that's assumin':

"At the bottom of this buildin' lies a big, BIG woman--Big Jule" (refrain)

I'll stand back and wait for the tomatoes to pass.