Too bad old Harold didn't live in Canada. I'm sure that his entourage would be most welcome there...
NEILLSVILLE, Wis. (AP) - A 64-year-old man has pleaded no contest to charges in Clark County Circuit Court after telling police he regularly had been using calves for sexual gratification. (He also apparently asked, "Doesn't everybody?")
Harold G. Hart was placed on two years probation Thursday and ordered to have psychological counseling and an alcohol and drug abuse assessment after pleading to charges of sexual gratification with an animal and disorderly conduct.
According to the criminal complaint, the family living on the farm Hart visited, installed a motion sensor because they had seen suspicious footprints and vehicle tracks. (not to mention bottles of Dom Perignon and empty boxes of chocolates next to the cattle stanchions)
When the sensor sounded, Hart was caught leaving the barn. He later told police the farm was a routine stop, usually after bar closing or on trips to strip clubs near Marshfield or Neillsville. (Well.. having been to such a bar in that area in my early, "wild days" (actually, in Wisconsin Rapids), and judging by their "stars", I would venture to say that there was probably very little difference)
Hart told police he had gone to the farm at least 50 times in the last year, sometimes two to four times in a week. (rumor had it that the cattle were overheard to exclaim, "Not tonight.. I've got a headache!")
(Filed under Fun Stuff)